Hearing Her Out
by gothamgirl28
Summary: A conversation between Sybil and Cora the day after Sybil's announcement in the drawing room. Inspired by Cora's brief conversation with Robert before dinner that night.


Author's Note: This is my first story, so I welcome any and all constructive criticism. I'm not sure if I got the characterization right.

* * *

Cora Crawley's mind was reeling. She still could not get her head around Sybil's announcement last night after dinner. She was in love with the chauffeur and was going to marry him. She was in shock. Her shock was not helped by the headache that had bothered her all day. As a result, Cora was lying down in bed at four in the afternoon. Her mind kept replaying the events in the drawing room, the words exchanged between Sybil and Robert. Cora had so many questions to ask her youngest, but didn't know how to approach her.

She was shaken from her thoughts by a knock on her door, followed by the door silently opening and Sybil popping her head in. Seeing that her mother was awake, she stepped fully into the room and shut the door without a sound.

"I wanted to see how you were. Granny mentioned this morning that you were lying down, implying that my news was the reason for your being indisposed."

"Well, your news last night came out of nowhere. I think I'm in shock. I'm still trying to process everything." Seeing a slight look of guilt flash on her daughter's face, Cora was quick to add, "But I'm also have a headache which I doubt can be blamed on your news."

Sybil nodded her head. She walked over to her mother's vanity and sat down in the chair. Usually when she talked with her mother in her bedroom, she would sit next to her on the bed. However, after last night, Sybil needed to keep a certain amount of distance, even if she desperately wanted to talk to her mother. Her family's reactions, though not unexpected, had hurt her deeply, and if this conversation ended up being a disaster, she could leave the room unimpeded from where she was sitting.

"I would like to talk to you about Tom. It was actually his idea. He thought I needed someone to hear me out, and he suggested you. He said that you've always listened to me and encouraged me, even if you didn't always agree with my opinions and decisions."

Cora gave her daughter a questioning look. "When did you talk with…Mr. Branson?" She tried to say his first name, but had a hard time replacing Branson with Tom. She settled for adding mister before his surname.

Sybil couldn't help but smile at her mother. She at least was making an attempt, even if she was reluctant to do so.

"I walked into the village and we had luncheon together at the Grantham Arms. We agreed to meet there last night after we left the drawing room. I actually left right after my conversation with papa and granny. I needed to get away from here for a few hours."

Cora looked at her daughter and said, "I take it that your conversation with your father and grandmother did not go well."

Sybil snorted. "That's an understatement." Sybil paused and took a deep breath. "Papa was so dismissive. He talked to me as though I did not comprehend what my decision meant." Deepening her voice to mimic her father's, Sybil said, "If you go through with this foolhardy plan you won't be received in London. Nor will you be welcomed at Court." Sybil rolled her eyes. "As if that will make me give up Tom. Not being welcomed or received by a bunch of people I have nothing in common with."

"But your father is correct Sybil. Marrying Mr. Branson will place you out of society. Have you really thought about what that would mean? Besides, I thought you enjoyed London and Court when you came out?

Sybil nervously played with the hem of her skirt. She had not expected this question and wasn't sure how to answer it. Then she heard Tom's voice in her head. _Just tell the truth._

"I did and I didn't. I loved London itself and all there was to see and do. You remember how much fun I had at the Tate and the National Gallery. And the British Museum was phenomenal. And I did love getting dressed up and going to those balls and dancing all night."

Sybil took a deep breath before continuing her answer. "But I was bored when we went to pay calls. I wasn't allowed to talk about politics and the vote. I couldn't discuss the books I was reading or my interests. I could only discuss the weather or dogs or riding. And when I was presented at Court, I felt like I was a piece of livestock being put on display at the market to be sold to the highest bidder. I did meet some nice men, but no one I would seriously consider as a husband."

Cora stare wide-eyed at her daughter. She couldn't believe what Sybil had just told her. She never said anything to her about how she felt, and Cora never noticed anything amiss with Sybil's behavior. Then her mind traveled back five years to Sybil's season and she realized why she never saw anything was wrong. Cora was focused more on Mary and getting her to say yes to Matthew's proposal than on Sybil, even though it was her season. And then it dawned on her that she and Robert had never really paid proper attention to their youngest. Sybil only had their attention when she did not act like the lady she was meant to be. _Though maybe she was never meant to be one…_

The silence stretched on for minutes while Cora sat thinking. Sybil began to fidget, unsure of what her mother was thinking. Finally, her mother broke the silence.

"You never said anything."

"You didn't ask and I didn't think anyone would listen," Sybil replied. "And then there was the baby."

Sybil watched her mother as she spoke. She didn't want to hurt her by bringing up old wounds, but she needed to tell her the truth. It wasn't that she was jealous of the baby, in fact she had looked forward to being a big sister, it was that the news of her mother's pregnancy prevented her from discussing, really discussing, her season with her mother.

Cora was lost in her own thoughts for a few minutes. Again, in thinking back to Sybil's season, she never did actually talk with her about it, only telling her how proud she was of her. _Proud that she didn't espouse her beliefs and acted like the perfect aristocrat, more like._ And then right after they returned, she found out she was pregnant. _Is this when Sybil began to slip away?_

_No_, Cora thought, _she truly began to move away from this life when she began nursing. She's been lost since the end of the war and the end of her nursing. She did say last night that she would get a job as a nurse in Dublin. Maybe this thing with Branson is just a reaction to the boredom she's felt recently. Though the way she looked at him last night…but still it could just be an infatuation…_

She looked at Sybil and said, "I know you've been restless and bored since your nursing ended. Is it not possible that this is simply a dalliance? I know Mary knew about your relationship, but it must have been a recent development, or she would have told us."

Sybil looked her mother in the eye and said, "This isn't a dalliance or a recent development. Tom first told me his feelings and proposed when he brought me to York for training nearly two and a half years ago." Sybil looked down as she recalled his proposal. "I didn't say yes, nor did I say no, not really. I was so surprised I didn't know what to say so I rather foolishly told him 'I was terribly flattered'."

Cora looked at her daughter in surprise. "That is definitely not something _you_ would say. Mary yes, but you…"

"I know, he knew and after that it only got worse. I laughed at his response because it was such a Tom thing to say, but he thought I was making fun of him." Sybil paused as a tear slid down her cheek. "The look on his face made me hate myself. I didn't deserve such a beautiful proposal."

Cora looked at her daughter wanting to know how he proposed, but not sure if she should ask. She decided not to, sensing that Sybil wouldn't readily share that bit of information.

"Please continue Sybil."

"Well, he was going to resign, but I told him that I wouldn't tell anyone what he said. Tom stayed on, but did keep some distance from me after I returned from training. As much as that hurt, I understood. I saw in his eyes that even though I hurt him, he still loved me, and he needed some more time before we could be friends again."

Cora's eyes widened at the revelation that they had been friends. "Friends?"

"Yes, friends. Anyway, I guess that's the real start of our relationship. We were and still are friends. Tom is the best friend I ever had or will ever have. He was the first person to really listen to me. Tom recognized my desire to know more, so he would suggest some books for me to read. Sometimes he even checked them out of papa's library himself so I wouldn't get into trouble. We don't always agree, but that's okay. Tom told me once that if he wanted someone who would parrot his words back at him, he could go into any village between here and Dublin to find a wife."

Her mother couldn't help but smile at that. Sybil would never be able to tolerate not having her own opinion. Cora wanted to know more. "When did things change for you after you came home?"

Sybil bit her lip, thinking over her answer. "Truthfully, I'm not sure they ever changed."

Cora looked at her daughter in shock and confusion. "What?"

"Let me explain. I was very confused about my feelings for Tom when he proposed to me. I had such a crush on him. At least I thought it was just a crush. He's incredibly handsome and smart. Here was a man who valued my opinion. How could I not have a crush on him?"

Cora nodded her head, remembering what it was like to be a teenage girl. Seeing her mother nod, Sybil continued. "After the incident at the count, we grew closer." She paused here as she remembered that day. "We held hands one time, at the garden party just before the war was announced. Neither of us pursued it. But the war brought us closer. Papa wouldn't share any information with me, some tripe about feminine sensibilities, so I went to Tom when I wanted to know something. Eventually, I started to go to the garage every day to talk with him. We didn't always talk about politics or the war. There were days when I needed to get my mind off of everything and he sensed it and would tell me stories about his life in Ireland. Other days I would be too upset to talk, having found out that someone else I knew had been killed. I would just sit in the garage while he worked on one of the cars. One time, I hid on the floor of the Renault when Anna came looking for me," Sybil laughed.

"Go on," said Cora. "I need to know more before I can understand."

Sybil nodded and resumed talking. "In truth, I think I've been in love with him for almost as long as he's been in love with me. But love was never really mentioned as a factor in considering marriage, and no one taught me what it feels like to fall in love. So as my feelings grew for Tom, I rationalized it as being part of the little crush that I had at sixteen. When he proposed, I told myself that the feelings I had for him weren't love. When I cried after hearing he got his draft notice, I convinced myself that I was only crying for a friend. When I cried on learning he wouldn't be sent to France, again it was because my friend was safe."

Cora couldn't help but laugh. "Oh my darling, you really were in denial."

"I know," Sybil laughed. "But I slowly stopped denying my feelings. First, by acknowledging that I was considering his proposal. But everything truly changed last July. I was in the garage for some reason I can't remember, and Tom started to make a case for why we should be together. And not for the first time. I got angry and started to walk away, and he stopped me by touching my hip with his hand. He pulled it away almost instantly, but his touch sent a jolt through me. I almost kissed him, but pulled away. I realized then that what I felt was love, but had been too scared to admit it to myself."

"So you've been engaged since last summer."

"No, only for three months. I only accepted him after we learned Matthew would walk again. When Matthew announced he and Lavinia were getting married, I saw Mary's face. The regret and sadness that washed over her. I didn't want that for myself. And I would look like that, feel like that if I said no. So I went to the garage after dinner and accepted him."

"But Sybil, you know there's more to marriage than just love?"

Sybil cocked her head to the side and looked at her mother. "Is there? I know you and papa weren't in love when you got married. But eventually you grew to love each other. Have you ever thought about what life would have been like if that didn't happen? If you had been stuck in a loveless marriage for all these years?"

The question surprised Cora. What would have the past thirty years have been like if she and her husband hadn't falling in love? Yes, he did give her a title, but would that have been enough in the long run? Would she have felt the disappointment of not bearing an heir more if she didn't have his love? Cora didn't want to think about the answers to these questions. Instead, she returned her attention to her youngest daughter.

"I'm still not sure what to think. I really don't know much about Mr. Branson except his name, that he's Irish, and he was a chauffeur. And that he is an aspiring journalist. Can he really take care of you?"

Sybil bristled at her mother's question. Cora noticed, and was quick to clarify what she meant.

"I'm a mother. I want to protect my children, especially my strong-willed youngest. What can you tell me about him? You're so determined to marry him, I should at least have some basic information about my future son-in law."

Sybil relaxed, recognizing her mother was just genuinely concerned.

"Tom recently turned 29. He's a smart and passionate man. Obviously, he's incredibly patient. You have to be to wait over two years for an answer. Honest. He can be full of himself, but he's honorable. More so than many aristocratic men."

"How so?"

Sybil debated whether to tell her mother about the elopement. But she knew there was no way around it now.

"Three months ago, a couple of days after I said yes to Tom, we eloped. Our plan was to get married in Gretna Green, come back to Downton, grab our things and go to Dublin. We only got as far as the Swan Inn several hours from here before Mary and Edith found us and convinced me to come home."

Cora closed her eyes, thinking that honorable meant they had slept together and he was trying to do right thing by Sybil. "Oh my God. Is that why he's marrying you?"

She opened her eyes upon hearing her daughter laugh. "The most we did was kiss. I offered to share the bed with him, but he didn't trust himself not to start something that we both might not stop. As I said, honest. He took the chair, only discarding his suit jacket, but keeping everything else on, including his tie and waistcoat."

Cora could not help the relieved expression that came across her face, any more than Sybil could suppress a laugh at said expression.

"It's not funny."

"I was laughing at your expression, not at what I said."

"What about in the time between then and now?"

"Nothing ever happened. We kissed and held each other, made plans, but Tom wanted to be able to look both of you in the eye when we told you. She paused, before laughing, "That and his mother will kill him if he touched me in that way before we are married."

Cora thought over what Sybil had just said. _He wanted to look both Robert and me in the eye…he cares about what his mother thinks…he definitely has a respect for women…and it was his idea for Sybil to talk to me…perhaps he will make Sybil happy…_

"What else can you tell me about Mr. Branson," she inquired. "What about his family? You mentioned his mother last night."

"Tom has six brothers and sisters, he's the second born and is the oldest boy. His father died unexpectedly when he was fifteen and he had to leave school and begin working. He's mostly self-educated." Here Sybil's voice took on a proud tone, "He was a good student. There was even hope that he would get a scholarship to attend UCD. But his family needed the money. Even though his older sister was working, her wages weren't enough for such a big family."

Cora took in this information. She knew from conversations with Robert that Mr. Branson was an avid reader. He actually used the library more than her husband did. Now she understood why. She couldn't help but to have an immense respect for him. He made such a huge sacrifice for his family. _Robert would blame my American blood. I would have to agree with him in this instance_.

"Sybil, is there anything else you wish to share with me about…Tom?"

"Mama, he waited for me for over two years. I know everyone is concerned that he'll hurt me in the end, but I've hurt him so much by making him wait for an answer. And after all that, he still is determined to make good on his promise to make me happy. You're right that he can't offer me the things that men of my class can offer me. But Tom offers so much more. Happiness, acceptance, patience and love. I have no desire for anything else except to be able to offer the same to him."

Cora sat in silence, contemplating everything Sybil had said. She knew how they fell in love. And she was certain it was love. The look on her daughter's face last night as she made her announcement, the way her eyes shone when she mentioned his name today, all of it screamed love. And she couldn't deny that Tom Branson loved her daughter. Last night, he looked at Sybil as though she was made up of everything good and wonderful in the world. It was that look that made the part of Cora that was not preoccupied with propriety think how lucky Sybil was to find a man who loved her so much.

She turned to her daughter and said, "While I'm still not sure about your plans, I refuse to disown my daughter. You can blame my being an American, but you are doing everything properly and I can see that he makes you happy. I'll try to get your father to come around and give his blessing, but I cannot promise you anything."

"Thank you mama for listening to me. For hearing me out." Sybil stood up and headed for the door, saying, "I need to start to figure out what to pack for my move."

"Let me know if you need my help."

Sybil paused and looked at her mother. "You should rest. We have the wedding this weekend. We can't have you getting sick." With that, she left the room, silently closing the door.

Cora began to form a plan to get Robert to give his blessing. She understood Robert's viewpoint, but she was not going to forsake her daughter. Cora sighed. Tom Branson was not what she wanted for Sybil. She wanted Sybil to never want for anything. But the Sybil in her mind and the Sybil before her were two completely different women.


End file.
